Musings

That was Indu

She lived in my neighbourhood. She was also my classmate. A short stature, thin girl, second among four sisters from a typical middle class family, she was like any other girl of our age except for one difference – she had a polio stricken leg. She walked with a prominent limp.. pulling up her dead leg with her hand. I still remember how she used to put her right hand under the knee, lift the leg up like a dead log and put forward.

We were sharp contrast to each other except for studies where we always tried to outdo each other. We two had different backgrounds, our upbringing was different… Me a serious quiet one and she a bubbly laughing girl, I was into athletics/sports and she could not even walk properly, we had a car to go places while they didn’t even have a two-wheeler. Cooks, maids, servants, gardener, pets etc. were all integral part of our life and they were just frillfree.
But friendship doesn’t see any differences and so ours also blossomed within no time and we became very good friends.

After about 4 months they shifted to Pandara Road as her father had got a bigger flat there. Then after a few more months when new session started, she changed her school to a local one there, as it was difficult for her to commute.

But we kept in touch. We felt a true connection in our lasting friendship. Since it was extremely difficult for her to board DTC buses, it was for me to go to her place. I was in south Delhi, my school was nearby, at times it was difficult to take time out to go to her place but I did. Week after week, months after months it was me who used to take DTC bus for going to her place. It had become a ritual to spend a whole day at her place studying, discussing & laughing together.

Not even once did I ever think that I was doing something extraordinary for her and that now it should have been her turn to visit me. I never weighed friendship in those terms and till date I have not changed. I don’t think friendship can be measured in terms of equality. It can happen between any two persons of any age and any background. Our wavelengths should match - no other parameters are required.

Accept people as they are. Never expect anything, always give.. for, it is their wonderful friendship you are getting in return.

It was a grave misfortune for her that in spite of being given the polio vaccinations, the disease had struck her. Sometimes fate has a much bigger role in your life than you expect it to play.

She was extremely simple girl, always smiling and had resigned to her fate of one leg. She never thought it as a problem or a hindrance to her life. Maybe she was used to it. In difficult times she had taught me how to smile. She was the rock, my pillar of strength whenever I needed her.

Towards the final years of school, the frequency of visits had reduced. That was the time when we didn’t have cell phones. After schooling we moved further apart. She took up Arts in college and went for plain graduation as her parents didn’t want to spend money on her.. .. it was to be saved for her dowry. It made more sense to them having four daughters and because of her one leg status she was the most difficult one. She never complained and had become very quiet. In fact she used to make fun of her future and used to call herself ‘one-legged girl’. Probably she was trying to laugh away the oddness in her life.

During those years, my visits to her had become almost nil. We were both busy in our own lives. In the meanwhile her elder sister got married and now it was her turn. The parents had started groom hunting. In the final year of her graduation, fortunately for her parents, one guy was ready to marry her for a hefty dowry. He had a small cloth shop in Ghaziabad.

When I came to know about her marriage, I cried. I knew she, like any other normal girl, had dreams.. dreams to get married to a decently educated well-settled boy and this one was just school passed !! I knew her choice, her taste and I knew she was succumbing to her parents’ pressure and no one could do anything.
Nevertheless, she took her marriage vows in December even before she could write her final year exams next April. She was assured that she would be ‘allowed’ to write them but apparently it didn’t happen. I had taken two day’s leave from college to attend her wedding.

On her wedding day I saw the groom. I was shaken beyond words !! He was no match for her by any means. He was a widower and at least 12 years older to her. She was smiling but her deep tearful eyes were telling a different story. She knew I could read them without a single spoken word.

It was a pain for her to be draped in a Saree when she had to lift her leg to walk and how she had managed to go up the stage, only I can visualize now. She was literally lifted by her cousin brothers to the stage. As it always happens in any wedding, she was the centre of attraction… ..not for being the beautifully adorned bride but for being the POOR unfortunate bride.

After the wedding they shifted to Indore, her husband wanted to set up a big showroom with that dowry money. Then after good four months I received her first letter. Yes, it was a letter not an e-mail. She wrote how happy she was adjusting to a big joint family, touching feet of elders every morning, wearing saree all the time and was in the family way. I could again feel the pain hidden in that letter.

The frequency of letters reduced further and by the end of first year of her marriage it had stopped completely.
I completed my studies, started working & traveling, shifted my base to Mumbai and was completely out of touch from my earlier world.

Now, recently, I came to know that she has passed away two years back leaving a motherless child.

That was my friend… my one-legged friend. That was Indu.

Current song- In The End - Linkin Park
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Tags : Friendship, Memoirs, Personal, Society, Thoughts

121 comments »

  1. rads said,

    June 27, 2007 @ 8:21 pm

    That was a tragic story, and I could sense your pain for a friend.

  2. Shrink Wrapped Scream said,

    June 27, 2007 @ 9:50 pm

    Oh, sweet lady, how horrible and tragic, for her and for you. I am so sorry for your loss of someone whom you obviously loved as dearly a sister. Time separates many from each other, but the bonds forever remain intact. Do you know why she met such an untimely end? I am sending you a big, warm embrace. Know you were her friend, and be comforted that she knew that too. x

  3. Peter said,

    June 27, 2007 @ 11:05 pm

    I so much liked and the same time hated to read this story. It’s so well told and thought, it’s so difficult and terrible in its contents!

    I really like your blog! Not only a photo, but there is always something more to it!

    (May I ask you, did you draw the young girl?)

    So, you never learnt to know her child? Do you know anything about her / him?

  4. niki sato said,

    June 27, 2007 @ 11:36 pm

    awww we dont care abt age, education and class of the marriage partner that much.
    no arrange marriage, no dowry :)
    i felt soo much cultural difference.

  5. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 2:32 am

    Rads,
    Welcome to my blog.

    And thanks for feeling the pain behind it.

    Thanks for dropping by. Looking forward to more of your visits.

  6. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 2:41 am

    Carol,
    Thanks a million tons for your lovely healing words. The news was indeed a shock for me.

    Do you know why she met such an untimely end?.. No, I don’t have a clue.. completely out of touch. She had moved to a smaller town. Perhaps complications of pregnancy or at the time of delivery… I am still not able to visualize her walking/doing daily household chores in her advanced stage of pregnancy.

  7. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 3:12 am

    Peter,
    Thanks a lot for your so encouraging words. They keep me going, blurting out my ramblings. Thanks very much !

    Sometimes, I really wonder how you stumbled upon my blog in the first place ? Could you care to tell me that ? Just a curiosity. I want to know how people come here.

    did you draw the young girl?.. No, the girl wasn’t drawn by me. My 16 yr old cousin brother did it for me sometime back.

    So, you never learnt to know her child?.. No, what I know, I have written here. In all probability by now the child must have got a step mother.

    Je vous remercie de vos mots aimables. C’est correct, monsieur ?

  8. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 3:17 am

    Nikichan,
    Oh yes, it is quite different culturally. Not much in metros, but generally we Indians are still into arranged marriages… not a bad idea if we get to know the partner before.

    Thanks for coming. :)

  9. Pyare Mohan said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 4:44 am

    Friends are people so special that even if you meet them after 50 years, it will be like you had just met them yesterday!!

    Sad story. Nice writing.

    Tc, :-)

  10. M O H A N said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 6:22 am

    Vagaries of fate is so sad at times… You are a good friend to remember.

    Regarding blogging i 100% agree with you.

  11. backpakker said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 6:49 am

    extremely sad…and when it happens to our near and dear ones…it really hurts

    and thanks for visiting my blog …

  12. Aditi said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 7:23 am

    i had a feeling this was going to be a tragic end.. i have often wondered and asked the same question.. if a guy is marrying for dowry? then the greedy jerk isnt going to keep his wife happy… its an institution i despise having lost a cousin to a “kitchen accident” a la movie style

  13. Bendtherulz said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 7:30 am

    Its easy to maintain blog….??? Don’t be sorry - when you get burdned - seek outsourcing…lol….

    Your post on Indu - sort of brings all the issues which somtime plague our society, may be parents could have spent the money intended for dowry on education and made their daughter much more empowered.Seriously marriage is not the ultimate solution….!!

    Though I am glad that your friend had you to talk in her growing up phase…very little - still something.
    tk care ~

  14. Peter said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 9:56 am

    Thanks for your complete answer to my questions, cuckoo.

    Now, my answers:
    I cannot remember how it all begun, but when I started my blog in March this year, I also started to visit others, randomwise, and I must have found your signature on one of the few I visited in the beginning. … and since then it has always been a pleasure to come back!

    Your French is perfect!

    Thanks also for your comments (and question) on myblog today. Answer is given there!

  15. desh said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 10:01 am

    its sometimes so difficult, u dont meet ur frnd for yrs, then somethng happens whch brings u two back and then again somethng…
    it is difficult bcoz for few days u cant put tht thought outta ur mind
    mayb th good memories still keep ur frndship alive

  16. Vijay said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 11:05 am

    Very moving post…

    Not even once did I ever think that I was doing something extraordinary for her

    Isnt it interesting that we never think about these things when we are growing up..

  17. Kalyan said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 11:27 am

    “Accept people as they are. Never expect anything, always give.. for, it is their wonderful friendship you are getting in return”…I differ on the ‘always give’ part. If you aren’t getting anything and only giving, after sometime you might rethink of that friendship.

    Now when you say at last “That was my friend… my one-legged friend”…I will endorse you views which you have made in the whole post.

  18. SiD said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 12:54 pm

    well… what to say.. you have said everything.. somethings without actually writing…Trust me, I completely understand the feelings behind the friendship you have ellaborated here..but sadly, I can never understand what you must be feeling after hearing the tragic news….

    and you should have given the link to your blog to the person who mentioned about blogs being a copy paste thing!!

  19. AJEYA RAO said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 12:58 pm

    Cuckoo, Its a very touching life you have narrated here. Any idea how she lost her life? Lovely, touching post. I had one similar post on mine of a dear friend i lost. I can relate to your sadness in the writing here.

    http://thehourssofar.blogspot.com/2007/02/i-first-met-munish-in-suratkal-bus-stop.html

  20. ashes said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 1:11 pm

    Hats off to you Cuckoo! The way you write, the way you narrate, the way you express, the whole of it is simply superb! Your posts always leave my eyes moist, this one being no exception.

    I was trying to imagine myself being in your shoes getting that tragic news. Boy, that would have been devastating!

    But yes, this brings up many of the social issues still prevalent. I believed they were on the decrease but very recently I’ve been hearing many such cases.

    Anyways, nice that Indu had such a good friend as you, and you doing so much for her without realizing.

  21. adi said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 2:27 pm

    the long comment i wrote was crashed in a comp error… anyways, i don’t feel this is the end. the end will come when she finally ceases to exist even in the memories of those close to her. in-laws and family. have a feeling that they will be glad to forget her.
    but not you. not me. your one-legged friend will stay with us forever.
    in peace, indu - wherever you are.

  22. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 4:24 pm

    PM,
    Yes, I agree. We had so much between us that we never felt distant from each other.

    Thank you. :)

    Mohan,
    Thank you. I think she was equally good to remember.

    And blogging.. yup !

  23. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 4:31 pm

    Backpakker,
    Yup, you are right.

    Keep coming.

    Aditi,
    Oh I think he was doing a favour to that family by marrying that ‘one-legged hopeless’ girl. I somewhat hated him when I saw him first.

    I am sorry to hear about your cousin.

  24. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 4:45 pm

    BTR,
    Eh outsourcing ?? Ok, be ready.. next time I am outsourcing to you !

    Yes, it brings up many many issues of our society, our world. Starting from why & how she got the disease, to her education, dowry system, mentality & attitude of everyone involved towards a female. Yes, I agree with you… marriage is not the ultimate solution.

    I am glad that your friend had you to talk in her growing up phase… Well, I think I was equally fortunate to have her.

  25. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 4:51 pm

    Peter,
    Ohh once again I thank you very much. Merci Beaucoup.

    And thanks. I saw the reply & commented again. ;)

    Desh,
    Yes, it happens. Yeah, the memories are going to linger on for the whole of my life.

    Thanks again for your visit. Keep coming.

  26. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 4:55 pm

    Vijay,
    Welcome again. Thanks for the appreciation. It came right from my heart.

    Isnt it interesting that we never think about these things when we are growing up.. Yes, and I always wonder why we grew up !

    Thanks for your comment on my post. Keep them coming.

  27. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 5:11 pm

    Kalyan,
    Well, it is your view. I wrote this post for my friend and for her friendship.
    I stress on the second part of that statement. i.e. “for, it is their wonderful friendship you are getting in return”. I think I could have done anything (within my parameters) to be her friend.

    Thanks for your lovely interpretation. Keep them coming. :)

  28. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 5:16 pm

    SiD,
    Thanks very much. I think you are one of those readers on my blog who understand my posts well. :)

    you should have given the link to your blog to the person who mentioned about blogs being a copy paste thing.. No, I couldn’t give him. What if he does copy/pasting from blog to his ? :P

  29. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 5:21 pm

    Ajeya,
    Welcome here. :) Thanks for feeing the emotions.

    Yes, I read your post on Munish when you posted it & remembered it very well and that is the reason why I gave you this link.

    Any idea how she lost her life?.. No, I don’t have any clue about that.

    Thanks for your visit. Keep coming.

  30. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 5:23 pm

    Ashes,
    I formally welcome you here on my blog. :)

    Oh thank you for your so nice encouraging words. I write from my heart, feeling what I am writing and often cry while doing it. Ha Ha.. me so senti silly lass. :P

    Yes, the shock was beyond my words.

    nice that Indu had such a good friend as you,.. I think I was equally lucky to have her as my friend.

    Thanks again for your visit. Looking forward to more of them.

  31. Cuckoo said,

    June 28, 2007 @ 5:25 pm

    Adi,
    So sorry to hear about your comp.

    Yes, Indu is going to stay with us forever. At least with me. Thank you for the lovely healing words.

    in peace, indu - wherever you are.. Amen.

  32. Maverick said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 1:48 am

    i see u were out of blogging too, he he he im feeling less guilty now.

    indu’s story could be any normal one-legged persons story.may they get more strength than pity.

    btw u hav a cook recent readers plug in, jus thinking of stealing it :wink:

  33. Cuckoo said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 2:47 am

    Maverick,
    Welcome after your ‘homely’ hiatus ! Hope you are not going anywhere now.

    Hmmm.. Indu. Thanks.

    Ha Ha… Taking clue from the first paragraph of this post ? ;)

  34. rk said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 3:51 am

    brought tears in my eyes.
    i feel for the kid.
    RIP indu.

  35. SiD said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 6:24 am

    the main reason which keeps a person coming to the blog again is that he can co-relate with it and understand it… guess it is the same case here…

  36. jarvarm said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 8:18 am

    so sorry for her..

  37. david mcmahon said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 10:16 am

    Hi Cuckoo,

    What a memorable post. A story we can all identify with. Thank you for sharing that with us.

    Cheers

    David

  38. Sam said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 10:39 am

    Cuckoo… somehow this narratin had sent a shiver down my spine.. i dunno why!! is this the incident u had promised u wud be telling me?? i am literally speechless…. your frnd indu had immense courage!! again somehow i am incensed at her parents… can’t figure out why!! damn!! am signing out…..

  39. Prashanth M said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 2:24 pm

    Ah! what a tragic story!
    RIP Indu…

  40. Sigma said,

    June 29, 2007 @ 4:59 pm

    This is really a tragic story …. such experiences bring about a lot of thoughts, and pain.
    I wonder what if her parents had not forced her to marry to someone who was quite evidently not a suitable match for her - perhaps she would have educated herself well enough to improve the quality of life for herself, and possibly her family as well. When would the narrow thought process of our society change?
    I was on my training in B’lore, where I made friends with a girl, who was also afflicted by polio … she was pursuing MSc, and was preparing to enroll for her PhD, in one of the best institutes in the country …. she was also very outgoing, and spirited. Once a very senior official asked her if she was bothered much about her “handicap” …. she gave a reply which I am not likely to forget - she asked the official if he viewed having to wear is spectacles as a handicap? perhaps not. In a similar way, she considered it a little bothersome, but no deterrant to anything she wanted to do with her life …. unfortunately, I lost contact with her after few years …

  41. Sugarlips said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 4:44 am

    Cuckoo, I’ve tears in my eyes rightnow, very evocative post.
    I wanna give you a big hug and tell you that she is in a better place now. May God rest her in peace and give strength to her family so they can go through this hard time.

    Stay Beautiful..!!

  42. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 11:48 am

    RK,
    Thank you for your concern. Yes, RIP.

    SiD,
    :)) I agree.

  43. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 11:49 am

    Jarvarm,
    Your first time here ? I welcome you to my blog.

    Thanks for your feelings.

    Thanks for your visit. Keep coming.

  44. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 11:57 am

    David,
    Thank you for appreciating the post. I know you are there as a friend.

    Thanks for your visit.

  45. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 12:04 pm

    Sam,
    You can imagine what must’ve happened to me when I heard it. Yes, it’s the same incident what I was talking about.

    Yeah, she was a courageous woman. Always fighting against odds with a smiling face. It is others who make these people feel pity about themselves.

    I can understand your feelings. Thanks very much.

  46. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 12:12 pm

    Prashanth,
    Thanks.

    Sigma,
    In our society, perhaps we still think that marriage is the ultimate goal for a woman. The parents themselves are under so much pressure from society. If they don’t marry this girl what would happen to her younger sisters, how is it going to affect their future and what is this girl going to do in her old age ? So many confusing questions.

    What a brave and apt reply your friend gave ! I applaud her courage. Thanks for sharing her story with us.

  47. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 12:20 pm

    Sugarlips,
    Thanks dear for your healing words and for that hug. You can imagine what must’ve happened to me when I heard it. In our society, perhaps we still think that marriage is the ultimate goal for a woman whether she gets education or not.
    Thanks again.

  48. Abhijit said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 2:01 pm

    very touching true story! will remember it fr a long time…

  49. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 2:24 pm

    Abhijit,
    :)

  50. bEAST said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 2:34 pm

    gosh! i thot i had left a comment in here sumwhr. has it been deleted? did i put up sumthin wrongly?

  51. Cuckoo said,

    June 30, 2007 @ 2:48 pm

    Beast,
    No, you haven’t.
    Please make sure that you don’t take much time while you type the comment else the word for ‘word verification’ changes. And if you close the window immediately after clicking the publish button, it doesn’t actually go…waits for you to type the new word for verification. :)

    Best would be to check before closing this window.

    So, can we please have the comment again ? Thank you. :)

  52. bEAST said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 7:10 am

    lolz, Il just do the samething again then!

    The day u updated the post, i saw it, read the first para and realized that the post is too long. Had my exams goin on, so didnt dare waste anymore time. Now that im done, i came back to read it. Sabar ka phal meetha hota hai! Definitely true! Great post!!

  53. Shake Al Ansaari said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 9:02 am

    I really liked you selfless attitude towards your friend….and i agree with you

    “Accept people as they are. Never expect anything, always give.. for, it is their wonderful friendship you are getting in return.”

    thnx for such a beautiful post

  54. bachodi said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 3:04 pm

    That was wonderful narration . I dont have words to tell the rest of the things

  55. Cuckoo said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 4:19 pm

    Beast,
    Yes, it worked !! Bola tha na maine ?

    So, how was your exam ? And what was it about, if I may ask so ?

    Hmmm.. And for the post - thank you. :)
    Thanks for dropping by. Keep dropping… ooops I mean keep coming. :P

  56. Cuckoo said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 4:22 pm

    Ansari,
    Thank you very much for all.

    :))

    thnx for such a beautiful post.. You are always welcome. Have you read my favourite posts ? Read them.. I am sure you’d like some of them at least.

    Thanks for your visit. Keep coming.

  57. Cuckoo said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 4:24 pm

    Bach,
    Thanks for liking the post. It came right from my heart.

  58. bEAST said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 6:13 pm

    im doing my masters in biotech. half a post grad now! lolz

  59. Cuckoo said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 6:34 pm

    Beast,
    Oh I always wonder why such a beastly name !

    Hmmm.. Biotech.. good subject.

  60. deepti said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 7:23 pm

    What do i say, at times, its better not to say anything, the knot inside the throat after reading this post need no words…
    Hi, hw r u?

  61. Mumbai Guy said,

    July 1, 2007 @ 11:45 pm

    Facts of life. Cruel but facts. I have seen these more than once. Keep bringing these topics, maybe it will ring a bell somewhere.

  62. Cuckoo said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 2:24 am

    Deepti,
    Welcome again. Thanks for your kind words. I can understand.

    I am doing fine. Thanks. How’s Adi ?

    MG,
    Welcome. After a break ? How have you been ?

    These things keep ringing bell in me all the time & that’s why they are here on my blog. :)

    Thanks for your visit. Keep coming.

  63. Keshi said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 6:48 am

    wut a sad ending to this beautiful girl! Im so sorry Cuckoo.

    **Now, recently, I came to know that she has passed away two years back leaving a motherless child.

    d u know how she died?

    **HUGS**
    Keshi.

  64. tulipspeaks said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 7:33 am

    i can feel the emotion in ur writing dear. its tragic.
    :(

    ammu.

  65. Maverick said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 8:18 am

    u got ur answer, check my blog.

  66. Ajith said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 11:11 am

    It makes me wonder again why it is necessary for parents of a girl to insist that somehow their daughter be married off.. With her education,she should have got a job easily I believe.. Is marriage a mandatory thing to happen in a girl’s life ?…I dont know..maybe I’m ignorant about female psychology..but these kind of things make me wonder why ppl do all kinds of compromises to get their daughters married off ..

  67. Sam said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 12:17 pm

    Cuckoo I am writing about this and would link you post there…. I hope you won’t mind!!

  68. Aashi Joshi said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 12:44 pm

    strong words……touches you and makes you feel helpless

    dunno what to say cuckoo….but well structured and touches the heart

  69. alpine path said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 1:45 pm

    I’m really sorry to hear of what happened. Goes to show all the discriminations that this society throws at us! I’ve no words to console you. And, very true about blogging. Most of us don’t use online links and news articles to put up a post. Its much more than that.

  70. Ash said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 2:18 pm

    Tragic and painful beyond words…

  71. Cuckoo said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 3:02 pm

    Keshi,
    Yes, a sad tragic end. No, I don’t know how she died.

    Thanks.

    Tulip,
    Thank you very much dear. I know you are always there to cheer me up.

  72. Cuckoo said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 3:05 pm

    Maverick,
    Ok, I’ll do that.

    Ajith,
    Yes, I too wonder why in our society it is necessary for a girl to be married off. So many unsaid questions provoke out of this thought.

    No, it is not about female psychology.. it is our society, the people around us who pressurize these girls to succumb to these wantons.

    Thanks for your visit Ajith, thanks very much for your support. I appreciate that.

  73. Cuckoo said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 3:14 pm

    Sam,
    Oh Sam ! Why should I mind it as long as you give credit to this post ? Go ahead friend.

    Aashi,,
    Welcome again. Thank you very much for liking it. It came right from my heart. Not really thought on words.

    No, you don’t have to say anything dear.. you came, felt the post.. it is more than enough. Heartfelt thanks.

    Thanks for your visit. Keep coming. Looking forward to more of your visits. :)

  74. Cuckoo said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 3:17 pm

    Alpine,
    I wonder why in our society it is necessary for a girl to be married off. Is she such a burden or is our surroundings so much caring in nature ?

    Thanks for your visit Alpine, thanks very much for your kind words. Nothing more is needed.

    Ash,
    Yup ! It is.

    Thanks for coming over.

  75. Hazel Dream said,

    July 2, 2007 @ 6:26 pm

    we all have selfish percpetion like you .. u assume that happines lies in only ur dreams .. may be she is happy there ?

  76. Cuckoo said,

    July 3, 2007 @ 2:49 am

    Hazel Dream,
    Hey Hazel, Where have you been ? After a long hiatus ??

    may be she is happy there ?. Yeah, I’ll assume that.

    Thanks for coming. Do it frequently.

  77. claytonia vices said,

    July 9, 2007 @ 2:48 pm

    While some people are still under the idea that women are a burden and should be ‘gotten rid of’ in a marriage, it is good to see some people coming out of this mindset. But I know we have a long way to go…

    Thanks for sharing this story…

  78. sahil said,

    July 10, 2007 @ 1:05 am

    Life can be so damn cruel at times. Its not hard to imagine how terribly hard a life physically handicapped people like Indu live.

    How killing is the thought that you suffer from a handicap that has no hope of every going away? The hopelessness is just so depressing and heart sinking. It leaves a lump in your throat.

    And then to have parents like that and a husband like that and just be born in a society like ours…

    Let me here tell you what I think should have happened. Its maybe a bit radical and disturbing, even cowardly, but I believe that the best end to this story would have been right in the beginning. I wish Indu’s parents had killed her when she was born. I wish such a wonderful person like her didn’t have to live the life that she did. It’s just so sad.

    (Btw, cuckoo, you write exceptionally well and very honestly and probably thats why you manage to touch a cord with the readers. This is the first time I have been through a few of your posts and I will keep coming now…Keep writing..Love and Peace)

  79. sahil said,

    July 10, 2007 @ 6:25 am

    Btw, I also commented on an old post of yours - on ‘feminism’ - i am not sure if you check comments on old posts so just thought i would let you know :)

  80. Tshhar Mangal said,

    July 10, 2007 @ 8:10 am

    i am speechless at this moment,,,
    all i can say is..even this ruthless man..has been moved for once,,,
    i really appreciate ur efforts miss
    …i think there are many more indu’s in our society whos story needs to be told…i congratulate you for enlightning us,,,
    we talk about so many issues,,,rape,enivornment,global warming…but tend to ignore such small yet so important issues…
    you know wat..i remebr when i was a kid…i used to accompany my parents to the rotary club meetings..whre they were involved in pulse polio campaigns…then i culdnt understand much…now i do…i realise why it is considered such an important task…
    keep up the great work…madam
    God bless you

  81. Cuckoo said,

    July 11, 2007 @ 3:56 am

    Claytonia,
    First I welcome you on my blog.
    Thank you for your kind words. Yes, we have a very long way to go. Glad to see that there are people who think like me. Thanks.

    Thanks once again for your visit. Keep coming.

  82. Cuckoo said,

    July 11, 2007 @ 4:04 am

    Sahil,
    First I welcome you here on my blog. Glad to see your detailed comments on my other posts as well. :) Thanks. (I get notification thru mail of all the comments on my blog.. even for my very first post). People keep visiting my archived posts.

    I totally agree with you. It is we (the family, friends & the society) who make these poor people realize their handicap however hard they try to come out of it.

    I wish Indu’s parents had killed her when she was born… Well, then I would have been deprived of her friendship ! On a serious note, everyday many female infants face the fate wished by you but still I would want to be born as a female again & again & again… Read here.

    Btw, cuckoo, you write exceptionally well and very honestly and probably thats why you manage to touch a cord with the readers… Thanks a lot. These things come right from my heart and readers like you encourage me immensely to blurt out my sane/insane thoughts in my own way.

    I will keep coming now… Now that you’ve promised, you HAVE to come again & again. :)
    Have a nice day !

  83. Cuckoo said,

    July 11, 2007 @ 4:10 am

    Tushar,
    Welcome here on my blog. Thanks for liking my post and I am glad that I could touch a chord in you.
    These things come right from my heart and readers like you encourage me to blurt out my sane/insane thoughts in my own way.

    I totally agree with you. It is we (the family, friends & the society) who make these poor people realize their handicap however hard they try to come out of it.

    Thanks once again. Hope to see more of you here.
    Have a nice day !

  84. Alok Meshram said,

    April 6, 2008 @ 4:57 pm

    Sad is this world that we live in, people like Indu enrich our lives, yet they are crushed under the weight of their own loved ones.

    This post almost made me cry, but I guess that’s no solution.
    When will we learn?
    Why don’t we realize the true nature of love?
    Why do we not love our own child enough?

    I’d like to refer you to this post of mine, especially the end.

  85. Cuckoo said,

    June 29, 2008 @ 10:06 pm

    Alok M,
    Sad ! sad ! sad ! It is our hesitation & reluctance to stand by a human who is our own & wants to live life.

    We live in a world of shallow values and illusions.

    Actually I was eating mangoes and suddenly her jubilant, childish expressions became live in front of me. She loved mangoes.

    I came here & read this post & I cried. Also realized, have not acknowledged your comment. I am sorry.

  86. Varada said,

    August 19, 2008 @ 10:42 am

    Thats a tragic story…. i guess her parents should have given more importance to her education and making her independant rather than marriage… I still dont understand why marriage is given so much importance in life, that people dont give imp to whom the gal is getting married but she is getting married is more imp to them.. well thats my point of view.. i might be wrong according to many

  87. Ajeya Rao said,

    August 26, 2008 @ 1:46 pm

    I recall reading this post before, this story makes me feel sad. I hope her child is fine.

  88. Prakhar said,

    August 26, 2008 @ 3:04 pm

    Remember her by the gr8 time you two had … life aint fair…

  89. parul said,

    August 26, 2008 @ 4:39 pm

    hi cuckoo…

    its my first time on ur blog….read ur post….
    must say i was touched to the core…i can understand ur pain coz even i had lost a very close colleague of mine….

    i ll bow to ur tribute to her…..

    kudos to u…..
    parul

  90. Vands said,

    August 26, 2008 @ 11:20 pm

    i can’t think of anything remotely sensible to say… the post just left me speechless.
    may her soul rest in peace !

  91. Lekhni said,

    August 27, 2008 @ 8:41 am

    Tragic. Why cannot parents understand that marriage at any cost does not really help their daughters ? :( Indu would probably have been happier if she had worked and lived on her own terms. In time, she would have met someone she liked and not have to compromise :(

  92. Priyank said,

    August 27, 2008 @ 11:02 am

    I was reading this and thought that this is familiar. Why did you post it again, what happened? Its so painful and shocking…

    Lot has already been said about family and society - all things that will take years to change. But there is something we can change tomorrow - The pulse polio programme (I would appreciate a medical practitioner supporting or explaining this): Did you know that the polio doses become ineffective if the bottles are not refrigerated? Yet many of our volunteers who administer these doses are either never trained or they don’t care to attend the training. Last year I read a news that some group of 100 volunteers refused to be trained (no reference). And then people go to these free centers again and again, then go to private doctors, and then…. (maybe pray)…just to be sure. Then we have some religious mullah claiming that this is a weapon against their religion. Gimme a break!

  93. Roop said,

    August 27, 2008 @ 8:43 pm

    wow, that left me shook, cuckoo.

    my sister’s name is indu too.

  94. Iceman said,

    August 27, 2008 @ 9:53 pm

    Yup, I do remember this one very well.

  95. Craver-VII said,

    August 27, 2008 @ 10:40 pm

    That seems so unfair. I hope they can somehow find a happy ending.

  96. ashes said,

    August 27, 2008 @ 10:44 pm

    Yeah, it is painful and shocking…what happened? Why did you post it again?

  97. sam said,

    August 28, 2008 @ 9:30 am

    I recollected the story the moment I read the name Indu. In fact, the last time you wrote this, I ended up writing one on one of my blogs. Anywyz, just dropped by say hello is more like it. Have been really busy in arranging for my post-grads and quitting the current job. Would be a student starting October and cease to be a professional in about 10 days time. :)
    cheerio.. take care!!

  98. Bendtherulz said,

    August 28, 2008 @ 3:35 pm

    Coming here after a long time….and reading this again…your last words are full of pain…and I am just praying that you weather this phase !!

    tk care and big hug xx

  99. Nisha said,

    August 28, 2008 @ 10:33 pm

    You write well. It brought tears to my eyes.

  100. उन्मुक्त said,

    August 29, 2008 @ 7:28 am

    कैसे अन्त हुआ, लिखने की जरूरत नहीं - हमसब जानते हैं। कई घरों में यही कहानी है।

  101. peter said,

    August 29, 2008 @ 5:45 pm

    I remember this post very well! Again extremely touched!

  102. sandeip said,

    August 31, 2008 @ 3:51 pm

    the link

    http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=ezVzSxthVW0

  103. sandeip said,

    August 31, 2008 @ 3:52 pm

    put a chatterbox…it somehow doesnt seem right putting the link here on this post…such a frivolous song…and on this post…

    naah

  104. Shekhar said,

    September 1, 2008 @ 8:30 am

    Visiting your blog after quite some time… a little disheartened to read this post. I dont know how to express grief in words… I would fall short… But I know how it feels…

    May her soul rest in peace…

  105. Mads said,

    September 1, 2008 @ 10:45 pm

    Reality bites…im left with nothing to say…
    U take care and May her soul rest in peace…

  106. Cuckoo said,

    September 2, 2008 @ 4:32 pm

    Varada, Ajeya, Prakhar, Parul, Vandita, Iceman, Craver,

    Thank you all for your concerns. It is social issue we are not able to handle.

  107. Cuckoo said,

    September 2, 2008 @ 4:34 pm

    Lekhni,
    That’s what parents don’t understand. The moment a girl is born, instead of welcoming her in this world parents start cursing their luck.

    Priyank,
    No, even I didn’t know about refrigeration but probably would have done it.

    Yes, you are absolutely right about it taking another turn.

  108. Cuckoo said,

    September 2, 2008 @ 4:35 pm

    Roop,
    Welcome here & thanks for your concern. I’ll send you the links… was not here.

    Ashes,
    I’ll write to you.

  109. Cuckoo said,

    September 2, 2008 @ 4:36 pm

    Sam,
    In fact, the last time you wrote this, I ended up writing one on one of my blogs… Yes, I remember that.

    Congratulations !! But be in touch. :)

    BTR, Unmukt ji, Nisha, Peter,
    Thank you all for your concerns.

  110. Cuckoo said,

    September 2, 2008 @ 4:37 pm

    Sandeip,
    Thanks a lot. I am yet to see it. Too busy. :(

    Hey I had a chatbox earlier on blogger, will think of it again.

    But you had my mail-id, eh. :P

    Shekhar, Mads,
    Thanks for your concerns. We can not do anything.

  111. Maggie May said,

    September 7, 2008 @ 2:09 am

    I have come here via David Macmahon and enjoyed you Sunday Roast and think this was a very touching post. Poor Indu.

  112. Louise said,

    September 7, 2008 @ 7:34 am

    I came here through the Sunday Roast at Authorblog and am so glad I did. What a touching story. No happy ending, but so real. You definitely caught me up in the tale of your friend.

  113. Cuckoo said,

    September 10, 2008 @ 12:44 am

    Maggie,
    Welcome to my blog.

    Thanks for enjoying my posts.

    I expect to see you more often here. :0

    Louise,
    Welcome to my blog.

    Thanks for liking the post, it is close to my heart.

    Thanks once again, keep coming. :)

  114. Ram Dhall said,

    November 20, 2008 @ 10:27 am

    I have just finished reading the post and am under some sort of spell. I can still feel the shockwaves in my body, heart and soul. Being from the same city and culture, I can possibly understand your emotions and your feelings for your friend.

    Your post has simply touched me to the core of heart. If I had your contact number, I would have straightaway called you to express my feelings. As Mirza Ghalib has said:

    ” De Ke Khatt Munh Dekhta Hai Namaavar,
    Kuch to paighame zubanee aur hai”
    .
    Season’s greetings, warm regards and God’s blessings.

    I sincerely mean every single word I said. What more can one say about such astounding narration !!!

    God bless you Cuckoo and be with you, always.

  115. Sharad said,

    November 20, 2008 @ 9:16 pm

    i never knew I am going to cry,after coming to ur blog..now I am..

    and yes Men do cry..I am..sobbing,weeping, my colleague just got up and asked me why? I asked him to read this… and now he is crying too…

  116. ~vagabond~ said,

    December 13, 2008 @ 9:08 am

    This was such a sad, sad story. I liked your matter of fact way of narrating the story…this story could have been written in a condescending way that humiliated Indu, but I like that you gave Indu some amount of dignity despite the sad state of her situation.
    I am sure this story touched many hearts the way it did mine.

  117. Nandan Jha said,

    December 13, 2008 @ 11:45 am

    God Bless.

  118. Cuckoo said,

    December 14, 2008 @ 3:47 pm

    Ram Dhall,
    I am sorry I am late in responding here but I had replied to your mail long time back.

    Sharad,
    Oh ho, now you don’t make me cry. Let us pray for her soul.
    RIP.

  119. Cuckoo said,

    December 14, 2008 @ 3:50 pm

    Vagabond,
    Well, she was never a kind of a person who’d get disappointed or let others down. She was the glow, the inspiration, the love and a lot.

    Nandan,
    I wish she was alive today. :(

  120. Sharad said,

    December 14, 2008 @ 4:04 pm

    May her soul rest in peace!!

  121. Saurabh said,

    September 7, 2009 @ 12:16 am

    Some kind of spell has caught me. Cant explain this but I can see my hair raised and my hands trembling.

    It is such a tragic post and so real too. My eyes have become moist.

    Hats off to you for writing this and waking us up from a dreamy sleep.
    RIP Indu.

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