Someone said it rightly……..

A dog can not be faithful. The moment it sees a bone, it runs after it.

Kuttey kamniey hote hain. Bahut kaminey.

Current Song:- Kaminey - Vishal Bhardwaj

I think I have made him crippled.
Forever.
He is warped now… beyond recovery.
He can not go anywhere. However hard he tries to manage without me, he can not.
I feel guilty. But happy too.

I changed him.
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* Click on the image for better view
* All figures are in %
* There are a few more but not worth mention since the % is less than 10
* Tamil – Can fully read the language without understanding a single word. That’s an achievement. No ?
Want an example ? See comment section. Whoever Read the rest of this entry »

Ae binod bhaiya …. kaahe ghabraat ho ? Kauno fikir nahi … eee hamaar blog hau…. samajhlu ? ae budbak, samajh mein aawa ki naahi…. injoy kara hiyaaan
(ऐ बिनोद भइया …. काहे घबरात हो ? कौनो फिकिर नाही … ई हमार ब्लॉग हाउ …. समझलु ? ऐ बुडबक, समझ में आवा कि नाही…. इंजॉय करा हियां)

Arrr… chai chali rauwa ke ?
(चाय चली रौवा क )

Current Song:- Hum to Aise Hain Bhaiyya - Sunidhi & Shreya Ghoshal

Yet again it is one of those days. Terribly alone, extremely lonely.

Isn’t it strange that I have so many different personalities in me and I still feel lonely.

Well past midnight.
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3:12 AM

What is being lonely ? Lonely, when you are surrounded by your own people, who probably care for & love you the most ? They ensure that the things are at your service even before you could ask for.

And then you start craving for something that was not so absolute & flawless yet perfect for you. What was your past. What you used to enjoy. Those fights, arguments, discussions, secrets..
Every small detail of those moments when you had lived a life. You were solely responsible for your deeds. When you had made friends and enemies on your own. Those friends who don’t love you as much as your own people. You are not the first priority in their lives. But still you want to go to them, have more & more of them. They were just like you with negative & positive traits.

Back then, your identity was the name given by them. Now, you don’t exist without your surname.

That was the time that showed your true identity, your choices, your taste, your character.
What you live now is fake. Ye sab to dikhawa hai, donning a mask of a gentleman, an obedient son or daughter, a loving sibling, perfect husband/wife.. everything picture perfect. 100%. So much perfect that you start hating it.

Sab kuch to hai, ab aur kya chaahiye ? (You have everything, what more do you want now?)

Aur ? Then the realization strikes. And strikes hard.

This is what you are going to be for rest of your life. Your life is no more yours. You are busy in performing the rituals of expectations, duties, responsibilities etc. and pleasing your own people in your own house. And you’ll continue to do so. Their taste is your taste. Their rules are your rules. A place where you should have been the most comfortable, you feel withdrawn and caged. What an irony !!

Pleasing.. .. the hated word in your dictionary has now become a norm.

When are you going to live ? Your OWN life in your OWN way ? When will you get that ‘Aur’ (more).

“He never drank. He never had sex. He never played any sport. He never loved. And when he died, the insurance companies denied him any claim. They said he never lived”.
This was one of the quotes I received in mail today.

However, this post is not related to it.

Current Song:- Aaj Phir Jeene ki tamanna Hai – Lata

I can clearly see the two distinct you and I adore; adore but can not separate them. For me you are only one.… you as an arrogant, private individual and you as simple uncomplicated submissive passionate man.. the blessed one can get both of you together… so, separation should have been the most important criteria but it isn’t.

Au contraire, so plainly you distinguish two of me.. the innocent bubbly chulbuli me and private beautiful passionate me… a woman, a perfect companion. 10 on 10. Probably 12 on 10. And at times you miss only one of me. Yeah, I can understand it very well .. hows & whys.. everything.. but do you know something ? You can not get only one of me.. to have one, you have to have the other one.
It’s a packaged deal.

Current song:- Yeh Mera Deewanapan Hai ya Mohabbat Ka Suroor–Susheela Raman
Technorati Tags: Scribbles Human Behaviour Relations

The imperfect me… the perfect you
Nervous me.. Patient you
Calm me… impatient you
Humble me .. Arrogant you
Serene me .. Asshole you
Listener me.. Chatterbox you
Mother me .. Child you
Little girl me.. Grandpa you
Protector me .. insecure you
Mellow me .. Gentle you
Beautiful me.. Lovable you
Ziddi main .. Ziddi tum..
Sharaab main .. Nasha bhi main

Sometimes it requires more than a couple to make a couple.

Current song- Chupke Se Raat Ki Chaadar Tale – Sadhna Sargam

Technorati Tags: Scribbles Love Human Relations

Good.. Close… Something more… Yet not Best…
Attraction… Spark… Craziness… Madness…
Confusion… Confession… Passion… Submission…
Wait… Restlessness… Fights… Desktop…
More fights… more waits… more restlessness…
Desires… Frustrations… Vicious circle…
Hai to Hai… Logic defies…

Stubborn… Headline… Impatient…
Phonecalls… XXII-VIII-MMVII… Closeness…
98 minutes 7 seconds… 138… Addiction…
Feelings… Pleased… Thrilled… Smile… Nasha…
Wildness… Lingering thoughts… Unconditional Smile…
Hai to Hai… Logic defies…

10 long days… 10 short days…
Intuition… Concern… Indecision… Dilemma…
Wait… Anxiety… Silence…
Confession… Honesty… Forgiveness ??
Once again ??
ANYONE ??
Once again Logic defies…

Void… Blank… Speechless… Silence…

Somewhere between these words were lost the sanctity, the innocence, the simplicity, the genuineness and hell lot of other things. Shock, tears, pain, hurt, agony are too small to describe the state.
Somewhere somehow something was inevitable. Smile please.

Period.

Over and Out. Or is there something still left ??
Note:- This also happens to be my 100^th post. Celebration time. Smile please.

Current Song:- Tujhse Naraaz Nahi Zindagi, Hairaan Hu Main – Anoop Ghoshal
Technorati Tags: Scribbles Human Behaviour